News Splash

News Splash

Carrot Ranch Flash Fiction challenge Splash

This week at the Carrot Ranch, Charli Mills challenged writers to In 99 words (no more, no less) write a story that makes a big splash. It can be fluid, or you can play with the idiom (to make a big splash is to do or say something that becomes unforgettable). Go where the prompt leads!

This is where it finally led me. I hope you enjoy it.

News Splash

It was splashed all over the front page. There was no hiding it now. Mum and Dad wouldn’t be pleased. They’d cautioned her to be careful. Time. After. Time. And she was. She thought she could handle it. She didn’t need them watching over her every move. She had to be independent sometime. But this front-page catastrophe would be a setback. How could she minimise the damage?

When they came in, Jess faced them bravely.

They looked from her to the paper and back. Jess’s lip quivered. “Sorry.”

“Those headlines look somewhat juicy,” smirked Dad. “More juice?”

Jess nodded.

Spilled juice

Thank you blog post

Thank you for reading. I appreciate your comments. Please share your thoughts.

49 thoughts on “News Splash

    1. Norah Post author

      I’m pleased you enjoyed the twist in my story, Hugh. I think your twists often go dark. Mine went light. 🙂
      I look forward to reading your story. I’ll let you know what I think when I do.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
    1. Norah Post author

      😂 Thanks, Debby. Actually, Anne Goodwin wrote an improved version which makes it all much clearer. You won’t have to wait. I’ll share it with you here.
      Anne’s version
      It was splashed all over the front page. No hiding it. Mum and Dad would be furious. They’d cautioned her to be careful. Time. After. Time. And she was. She thought she could handle it. She didn’t need them watching her every move. She liked being independent. But would they trust her after this?
      When they came in, Jess faced them bravely.
      They looked from her to the paper and back again. Jess’s lip quivered. “Sorry.”
      “Those headlines look juicy,” smirked Dad. “Looks like you need a refill.”
      He picked up the jug. Jess passed him her empty glass.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
    1. Norah Post author

      Thanks, Kate. I think this writer just needs to make better use of the 99 words. Poor little Jess was devastated when she spilled orange juice all over Daddy’s newspaper.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. Norah Post author

        Oh dear. I’m not so good at squeezing all the story into 99 words. Some people tell so much. I’m the same with time. Others seem to fit in so much more than I do.
        As I just explained to Pauline, three-year-old Jess spilled orange juice all over Daddy’s newspaper. Catastrophic only for the child, and the author. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply
          1. Norah Post author

            Nah, I think it was me. No one seems to have got it. I’m not sure if I try to tell too much, or am just not effective in telling a little. I’ll work on it.

            Like

            Reply
    1. Norah Post author

      Oh dear. I was hoping my second illustration may have added some clarity. I just don’t seem to be able to do it in ninety-nine words. Perhaps I should ask Charli for an extension. 🙂
      Jess is a three-year-old and had difficulty pouring the orange juice from the large carton. She spilled it all over the newspaper. Perhaps I should have just said that. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
        1. Norah Post author

          Nah! My bad! I should have been able to tell it all in the words.
          Actually, over at the Carrot Ranch, Anne Goodwin tweaked my story and told it much more effectively in 99 words. It was very helpful advice and shows me where I could have refined the story to make the message clearer. I don’t think she’ll mind if I share it here with you and I’m sure you’ll agree that it is more effective in getting the message across.
          Anne’s version
          It was splashed all over the front page. No hiding it. Mum and Dad would be furious. They’d cautioned her to be careful. Time. After. Time. And she was. She thought she could handle it. She didn’t need them watching her every move. She liked being independent. But would they trust her after this?
          When they came in, Jess faced them bravely.
          They looked from her to the paper and back again. Jess’s lip quivered. “Sorry.”
          “Those headlines look juicy,” smirked Dad. “Looks like you need a refill.”
          He picked up the jug. Jess passed him her empty glass.

          Liked by 1 person

          Reply

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