This week at the Carrot Ranch, Charli Mills challenged writers to In 99 words (no more, no less), write a story about what freedom feels like. Whose point of view do you use? Does the idea of freedom cause tension or bring hope? Let the reader feel the freedom. Go where the prompt leads!
Last week, the prompt was Danger Zone. My story saw a couple of playful children ‘trapped by quicksand’. I thought it appropriate to free them this week. My story begins where the last one finished. I hope you enjoy it.
We’re Free!
Help! Save us!
What’s wrong?
Can’t you see? We’re sinking. It’s quicksand! Help!
I’ll save you! I’ll pull you out!
Quick!
Okay. Stay right there! I’ll get a rope.
Jane, Jane. Quick, Give me your rope. The boys are sinking in quicksand. We have to get them out — before it’s too late.
I’ll come too.
Where are you going?
We have to save the boys! They’re sinking! It’s quicksand!
Quicksand? I’ll help too.
Quick! Grab the rope! Now, everyone, on the count of three, one, two, three, pu-ull! Pu-ull! Pu-ull!
Made it! You saved us! We’re free! Thank you.
Thank you for reading. I appreciate your feedback. Please share your thoughts.
Note: The collection of stories made in response to the previous prompt Danger Zone, including mine, can be read at the Carrot Ranch.
Norah Colvin 
I know how just swimming in the sea can get ‘sand’ in your ‘shorts’…
Clean up from quicksand must be just as, if not more messy!
Nice ‘save’. 😀
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Extremely messy, I would say.
Thank you.
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Knowing that the child’s world is often where your 99 are set, this brought me right back to my own childhood and kids’ games. Quicksand figured prominently for us! ❤
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I hope you always escaped it too! 🙂
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I knew you’d get them out of that quicksand. It sure felt like a real playground to me, the language and actions of the children is authentic.
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Thanks, D. I try to make it authentic. Having spent most of my life with young children, I’d worry if I couldn’t. (Particularly when I say that I’m just a six-year-old at heart.)
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Cool sequel to last week’s story, Norah. Loved it.
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Thanks, Nan. I was pleased to be able to continue it. 🙂
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This sounds like a universal story, Norah. I’m sure I’ve been pulled out of quicksand myself on occasion as well as pulled out a bunch of kids. Loved the imagination and the helping spirit.
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Thanks, Diana. I’m pleased the story’s truth shone through.
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Loved part two that you freed the kiddies this week Norah 🙂 x
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Thank you, Debby. 🙂
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HI Norah, it’s nice to read the sequel to the quick mud saga. Well done.
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Thanks, Robbie.
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Hey, Norah, it’s lovely to see you after a long time. 🙂
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It’s lovely to see you here. Have a great week.
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Phew, quite exciting! As a kid, it was always fun to pretend you were in quicksand🙀
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And even more fun to get out! Thank you, Steve.
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Hooray! A perfect follow-up story, Norah.
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Thank you, Jennie. I’m pleased you like it.
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You’re welcome, Norah.
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Beautiful, and somehow also metaphoric timely. Thanks for sharing, Norah! Have a nice weekend! xx Michael
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Thank you, Michael. Have a great week!
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Reblogged this on NEW BLOG HERE >> https:/BOOKS.ESLARN-NET.DE.
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This has a beautiful word balance – with the two janes (“Jane, Jane”) to beckon and then the way they counted one ten three and then there were three pu-ull
And I felt the urgency to then have a successful ending (and girls residing boys – right on)
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Thank you, Yvette. I appreciate your comment. It’s lovely.
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☀️😊
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Quicksand is trickier than it sounds. Glad they survived!
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Yeah, they’re kids. They had to. Thanks, Jacqui.
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