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Flakes #99Wordstories

This week at the Carrot Ranch, Charli Mills challenged writers to In 99 words (no more, no less), write a story using the word or idea, flakes. What or who is a flake? Is there tension or phenomenon that is creating flakes? Can flakes be massive or minute? Go to your flakiest memories for living images to play with. Go where the prompt leads!

This is where I went. I hope you enjoy it.

Retro Black Light Disco

On their first date, Paul took Josie to the Retro Black Light Disco. She’d heard about it but never been, so was curious. “Wear something white. You’ll really stand out,” her older friends advised. Josie was amused that Paul dressed all in black, as usual, but guessed some habits were hard to break. Josie absolutely glowed under the lights, but Paul virtually disappeared. Until he turned around, looking like he’d brought a glowworm army on his back. Josie started to say, “How beautiful!” when she realised they were flakes of dandruff. “Gross,” she thought. “I’ve seen enough,” she said.

Thank you blog post

Thank you for reading. I appreciate your feedback. Please share your thoughts.

Note: The collection of stories made in response to the previous prompt Cryptozoology, including mine, can be read at the Carrot Ranch.

Comments

39 responses to “Flakes #99Wordstories”

  1. Anne Goodwin Avatar

    Love this. The surprise ending made me laugh.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Norah Avatar

      I’m glad, Anne. Thank you. We both went down the dandruff path. 😂

      Like

  2. D. Avery @shiftnshake Avatar

    Oh Norah! Unexpected! Thinking there won’t be a second date.
    Well done, Buddy.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Norah Avatar

      We’ll see about a second date. It’s not looking good. 🙂

      Like

  3. pedometergeek Avatar

    Wow! Great ending, and such a surprise, Norah. I snorted when I read it (and generally, I don’t snort when I laugh, but it was just too good). Thanks for my day-brightening moment.
    ~Nan

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Norah Avatar

      And you’ve just brightened my day, Nan. Thank you so much. My intention was to make it funny, but not everyone found it so. I’m pleased you did. Thank you. 🙂

      Like

      1. pedometergeek Avatar

        Glad I brightened your day, Norah. I loved it, and really found it humorous. What can I say: I’m a bit warped! 😉

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Norah Avatar

          Then we are a good pair, Nan. 😉💖

          Liked by 1 person

          1. pedometergeek Avatar

            Indeed we are, Norah! 🙂

            Liked by 1 person

  4. Summer Reading – Coffee Post (& Welcome November) – priorhouse blog Avatar

    […] coffee, I would tell you that last summer we enjoyed reading some books from blog friends, like Norah Colvin’s Wombat Digs In (Here on […]

    Like

  5. Prior... Avatar

    wow – the touch of humor was a great ending – and it was fun to switch gears – I was feeling the beauty of the white shirt and then the moody part of disappearing in the all back outfit – to have the dazzle and sparkle of dandruff – hahahaha

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Norah Avatar

      Thank you so much, Yvette. I’m pleased you found it amusing. That was my intention. Other found it gross and tacky. That wasn’t my intention.

      Like

  6. Chel Owens Avatar

    Well, if white covered for her problems, maybe they have something in common!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Norah Avatar

      Maybe. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  7. TanGental Avatar

    I didn’t expect tacky. Well done for subverting my expectations.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Norah Avatar

      So sorry, Geoff. I don’t know what got into me. You’ll have to keep your expectations lower in future.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. TanGental Avatar

        I have been warned!!

        Liked by 1 person

  8. Miriam Hurdle Avatar

    What a surprised ending. Very clever, Norah!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Norah Avatar

      Thank you, Miriam. I’m pleased you thought so. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Miriam Hurdle Avatar

        You’re welcome, Norah! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  9. robertawrites235681907 Avatar

    Oh dear, that is unlucky. He needs to get anti dandruff shampoo.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Norah Avatar

      He does indeed. Dandruff never makes a good impression.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. robertawrites235681907 Avatar

        No, but acne is worse and on the increase due to stress.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Norah Avatar

          I’m not moving in those circles at the moment, but I understand that could be true.

          Liked by 1 person

    1. Norah Avatar

      Sorry, Jacqui. I guess it was. I meant it to be funny. 😦

      Like

      1. Jacqui Murray Avatar

        Oh it was funny. The dandruff–I bet it would show up in certain lights!

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Norah Avatar

          I had to ‘google’ it to be certain. Dandruff and other (more) unpleasant things show up.

          Liked by 1 person

  10. Jennie Avatar

    Haha! Well done on ‘flakes’!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Norah Avatar

      Thanks, Jennie. I’m pleased you enjoyed it. It was meant to be funny, but not everyone found it so.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Jennie Avatar

        Really? It was hilarious.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Norah Avatar

          Yay! I’m so pleased you think so. Thank you. 💖

          Liked by 1 person

          1. Jennie Avatar

            You’re welcome!

            Liked by 1 person

  11. robinettercleave Avatar

    Oh dear! Wasn’t quite what I was expecting!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Norah Avatar

      Oops. Sorry to disappoint, Robin.

      Like

  12. Darlene Avatar

    I remember those days. Also, the white socks stood out like beacons!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Norah Avatar

      They did. It was fun. I don’t actually remember dandruff showing up under the lights, but an online search told me it did (and other unpleasant things). 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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